The McLaughlin Group

Please tune in to The McLaughlin Group this weekend. Check your local listings for time and channel, or visit www.McLaughlin.com for more information.

Told You!

From ABC News today: "Taking the stage for the 21st and possibly 22nd time, Sens. Hillary Clinton, D-N.Y., and Barack Obama, D-Ill., could debate at least twice more before the critical Pennsylvania primary on Tuesday, April 22.  LINK

"Both candidates have accepted an ABC News debate in Philadelphia and Obama has accepted a similar invitation from CBS News to debate at a location to be determined in North Carolina."  LINK

And I KNEW It!

From today's New York Times:

"Federal prosecutors are investigating whether Gov. Eliot Spitzer used campaign funds in connection with his meetings with prostitutes, including payments for hotels or ground transportation, three people with knowledge of the investigation said.

"Prosecutors have asked the governor’s lawyers about the travel arrangements for three trips, including his Feb. 13 rendezvous with a prostitute at the Mayflower Hotel in Washington. The United States attorney’s office in Manhattan has also asked about the governor’s use of car services during trips to Washington.

"The governor’s lawyers have begun consulting with a campaign finance expert who has long worked for Mr. Spitzer’s political organization to see whether campaign money was spent on the trips, including some as recently as last month, a person briefed on the investigation said."  LINK

The Democrats are inflicting cruel and unusual punishment on us. They should have to sit in the corner for the next 4 years.

Sorry is the Hardest Word

There was one person carefully watching former New York Governor Eliot Spitzer's resignation yesterday---and his apologies: the Junior Senator from his state.

After hearing Spitzer say he was sorry for his criminal behavior, Hillary Clinton began an "apology tour" of her own.

Speaking to a group of over 200 black community newspaper publishers and editors, Clinton apologized for everything except the fall of Adam and Eve: she said she was sorry that her husband dissed Barack Obama as Jesse Jackson 2.0, for Geraldine Ferraro's comments that Obama wouldn't be where he is if he weren't black, and for the government's response to Hurricane Katrina.

Fascinating, coming from a woman who never apologized for putting the country through:

Whitewater, the travel office firings, Vince Foster, the Rose Law Firm billing records scandal, Jim and Susan McDougal, the transfer of high-tech to China, the influx of illegal Chinese money to the Clinton campaigns, the Waco slaughter, the failure to respond to 4 major al Qaeda attacks on the U.S. during the 1990s, Paula Jones, Kathleen Willey, and Juanita Broaddrick, the failure to deal with the Rwandan genocide, Monica Lewinsky, impeachment, pilfering White House furniture, her brothers peddling pardons out the back door for $400,000, the pardons of the FALN terrorists and of Marc Rich, the failure to release tax returns, deliberately darkening a photo of Barack Obama, and putting out another one showing him in Somali dress.

I could go on, but there is limited space on the internet.

Spitzer's apologies may well have been sincere. But if you asked the Junior Senator if her apologies are sincere, she'd likely respond, "I'm sorry, what?"

Emperor Who Prefers No Clothes

It's the height of laugh-out-loud irony that now-former New York Governor Eliot Spitzer would be nailed for allegedly using a hooker service called the Emperor's Club.

For decades, Spitzer lorded over the state with haughty self-righteousness, out of control sanctimony, and arbitrary applications of his wrath. In other words, just like the Emperor whose "Club" he's alleged to have frequented.

Now he's through: destroyed by his own hand. Political tragedies always seem to follow this same, pathetic script: smart men, highly ambitious, working their entire lives to get to the pinnacle of power, then demolishing it all in a blaze of crimes and humiliation. Think Nixon, Clinton, now Spitzer.

Spitzer relished his role as Crusader: wearing a self-designed Cape of Rectitude, he proclaimed to root out corruption, fraud, and all other illegalities. He made a career of prosecuting high-profile white collar crimes involving big-time guys on Wall Street. He went after corporate America, nailing executives for misconduct with feverish glee. As state Attorney General, he routinely prosecuted those involved in prostitution.

His ego knew no bounds: "I'm a (expletive) steamroller!" he said last year, with characteristic elegance and humility.

When he stormed into the Governor's Mansion in 2006 with an historic 69% of the vote, he was touted as a potential candidate for president. But the dream soon died, because of his inherent vindictiveness. He said he went about prosecuting the Bad Guys, but he was quite a Bad Guy himself. He and his administration began to draw fire for conducting a "dirty tricks" campaign against top state Republicans. Investigations were launched into his use of state resources to "dig up dirt" on the Senate Majority Leader, Republican Joe Bruno, and his orders to aides not to cooperate. Those investigations are still ongoing.

And then, most infamously, was his craven proposal to give driver's licenses to illegal aliens, which he abandoned only after Hillary put the screws to him after it had hurt her presidential campaign. One wonders about the immigration status of his particular hooker, alleged to be a gal named "Kristen." Ole!

This is all particularly rich, given that he ran on an "ethics" platform: he was going to "clean up" Albany, change the way things were done in state politics, impose draconian punishments on those who violated ethics codes, and insist on only the highest standards.

A politician should never set those standards unless he or she is prepared to live by them. Democrats are always eager to plaster Republicans caught in these kinds of naughty scandals as hypocrites who violate their "family values" platforms. Spitzer wasn't particularly a "family values" guy, but he WAS a "legal values" guy. As he constantly reminded everyone, he was the Chief Law Enforcement Officer of New York for a reason. I can't wait to see the Democrats call him a "hypocrite." (Insert cricket sound here.)

Speaking of low standards, Bill Clinton stayed in office while fighting embarrassing charges of perjury and obstruction of justice related to sexual harassment allegations. Very few resign in disgrace anymore, because one needs a sense of shame in order to feel disgrace.

The Clinton-Obama tug-of-war pales in comparison to this melodrama. At least we now have a new soap-opera to give us some relief from the bleatings of the Hereditary Monarch and the Hope Guy.

When something like this blows up, look for the guy who is the quietest. There are plenty of politicians and pundits all over the media, shrieking with their schadenfreude. But the person with the most to gain always holds his cards close to his vest and carefully watches from the wings, biding his time while others flip out. Who is the quietest now?

New York Mayor Michael Bloomberg. Last week, former New York Senator (and continuing power broker) Alfonse D'Amato indicated he'd support Bloomberg for Governor. Bloomberg himself let those comments go without even a faux denial of interest in the office. There is a chain of succession, but the Lieutenant Governor is legally blind and the Attorney General is Andrew Cuomo, who had been investigating Spitzer. Bloomberg should saddle up that white horse, because this mess calls out for some semblance of a White Knight.

In the meantime, Hillary has been given a fantastic new campaign theme: "Male Politicians Lead with Their Other Brain, and It Always Ends With An Intern or a Hooker. A Woman President: It's Time."

Dennis Miller

I will be hosting The Dennis Miller Show tomorrow (Wednesday, March 12). Please visit www.dennismillerradio.com for stations and times. Please join me for smart talk and hearty laughs.

The Other Shoe To Drop

Any bets that Bill Clinton is Client #8?

The Next Stops

For Governor Eliot Spitzer:

1. Rehab.

2. Then Barbara Walters.

For the hooker-with-a-heart-of gold, "Kristen:"

1. Book deal.

2. Then Oprah.

3. Then new career as TV self-help coach.

Viva America.

Democratic Party in His Pants

New York Governor Eliot Spitzer will resign after being nailed for allegedly patronizing a prostitution ring.

There goes another Hillary Superdelegate!

She's got to stop this. She can't lose another one. Who cares about Spitzer when her candidacy is at stake?! Who cares about his wife's personal humiliation (been there, done that!) and the fact he may be going to the Big House and disbarred (been there, done that too!). This is all about her. She's calling prosecutors. She's calling Charlie Rangel. She's calling Ed Koch. She's calling Robert Morgenthau. She's calling President Bush.

Spitzer must be allowed to vote as a Superdelegate.

Save Spitzer!

Free Spitzer!

But They're Not Biased

Here they go again.

The New York Times has a lead story today about John McCain's past battle with the most deadly form of skin cancer.  The headline blares, "On the Campaign Trail, Few Mentions of McCain's Bout With Melanoma."

So let's remind everyone that he once had melanoma!

This comes on the heels of their story last Friday that he got "testy" with one of their reporters, who needled him incessantly to try to provoke his temper.  He remained incredibly calm and patient when dealing with her; finally exasperated that she had failed to get him to blow his top, she blew her cover: "Why are you so angry?" she squeaked.  Of course, he wasn't angry at all.  Annoyed at her idiocy and agenda, yes.  But blowing a gasket?  No.  Much to her disappointment.  Of course, she wrote the headline and story she wanted: "McCain Grows Testy."

Both of these stories follow the biggest smear of them all (so far): the front pager from three weeks ago, alleging McCain had an inappropriate relationship with a female lobbyist.  Without sourcing, evidence, or backup material, the Times ran the story anyway.  Rather than go on the defensive, which was the Times wanted him to do, McCain went on offense, calling a press conference and answering every question the press could throw his way.  The Times then got bombarded with thousands of emails, condemning its scurrilous and unfounded attacks on McCain.  Embarrassed, the Times' Public Editor opined that the paper never should have printed a story without credible evidence to support it. (They need a Public Editor to tell them that?!  I guess they do.)

Embarrassed, but apparently not dissuaded.  Over the past three days, the paper has deliberately tried to provoke his anger so they could argue he's temperamentally unsuited for the presidency.  And it has questioned his physical fitness for the office because he had melanoma in 2000.  Although the piece says his prognosis is "favorable" and that "his doctors consider him in very good health," the Times got the word "melanoma" in the headline.

Just as with their other hit job stories on McCain, their work here (at least for the day) is done.